Ahhh... Everyone seems to have one of these, so... Here it goes!
My Natural Story truthfully begins almost 12 years ago ( JEEEZ I'm getting old!) in high school. By the beginning of senior year, I had begun 'dating' a popular football player, scored the rank of co-captain cheerleader, and wanted to change up my look for the better. I wanted to fit this "new me" that had blossomed over the summer of 98, and had finally become the girl I'd wished to be all 3 years before then. So I did what most teen aged girls do. I dyed it Kool-aid red and damaged it, with a T-boz cut, no less, ( Long stupid pieces in the front and short bob in the back... sigh... please don't judge me) and I hated it after 3 weeks. This will remain UNpictured! lol
So I BC'd right then, consulting with my long time stylist, the only woman to EVER cut my hair, and she told me that I had a "good grain of hair" <--- whatever that means... and that I could cut it very short and would only need a texturizer. Well.... the Jheri curl look is what I wound up with. Needless to say, the man and I broke up. Note: I did get that sucker back in the end... but his rejection of the new "short hair" me, did a NUMBER on my self esteem. Who does that? Break up over hair - a week after the L word?? High School. SMH. So I permed it, and rocked the Halle Berry. *shrugs*
In the short year after that I experimented with black, blue black and jet black coloring, and kept it in the "Halle". Once I made the Woo Woo cheerleading squad at Virginia State, however, my coach had other plans for me. "You're cute but grow some hair." Knowing I had hair like my mothers, and could grow hair like I'd nothing better to do, I agreed and it was no big deal. I didn't perm as often as I did as a teenager, here. Just a touch up every 12-15 weeks was good for me.
What is a Woo Woo you asked? Have a seat. :)
Fast Forward to my Junior year, two years into meeting the love of my life, my late husband Jason, my REAL natural story began almost 9 years ago when we found out we were preggers. Yep. BEFORE the engagement part, if you know what I mean. lol. After the no-brainer decision to become parents and get married, since we'd planned to anyway I read all I could about the dangers of perming while preggo. Terrified of harming the baby in any way, I grabbed my shoulder length permed tresses and cut a huge chunk out, about 3 inches from the roots so I couldn't chicken out. I hacked off all of it, using copy paper scissors ( you know the good kind with the orange handle! lol) and started rocking weaves to hide my twa.
6 months after the 10 lb baby arrived (Justin Kristopher!) my hair had been bleached blonde and was already back down to my shoulders unstreched. Preggo hormones will do that for ya! I was rocking the press n curl ( at my mothers behest) and wearing it in knot-outs before I knew what knot outs were! Wash n go's and twist outs too! Fighting with my hair and its dense frizzy curls wasn't easy tho, and as a new mommy, I hacked off my hair again and permed it, and went right back to the weaves and wigs. All that maintenance while trying to nurse and be a house wife was the worst! And going back to work was not a game either! I quickly learned to do my own sew ins, and so tracking it up was my go-to style. My husband had shoulder length locs at the time though, and I was hecka curious. I decided to grow out the perm and I went to the African braiding salons asking about locs, and was told I would not be able to loc my hair, because it was "coolie hair". ( I learned many years later from my Trini cousin that that is NOT a nice word for Afro-East Indian people who's blended heritage was...less than supported in the Caribbean.) Though it is true my mother's heritage does include Dominican people, who were probably of Afro-Indian decent, I paid no mind to the stylists and argued, if Asian people could loc, so could I!It took me several months, but my hair finally did loc, and ironically, as soon as mine were set and permanent, Jason wanted to cut his off to "better assimilate to corporate America". My man was struggling to find a job, bless his soul and was willing to do whatever it took to support our new little family. I helped him cut them off, and to remember them I wound a few of his into my new locs. I kept my locs for 6 hair happy years. :)
When he died in early 2009, and I was finally able to take a step forward - 7 months later- I decided it was time to enter a new chapter of my life, and to symbolize the rebirth, my new chapter would begin without my locs. They were too painful a reminder of the "old me" and my old life. I did not cut them all off, however. I cut off about 12 inches, and undid the rest of them, leaving about 7-8 inches of hair, blown out. ( Which took me 2 months to do!! I had to two strand twist each undone loc, and that was less than fun, I'll say that much!) I reinvented my definition of self, and haven't looked back ( for too long!) since.
Now, almost 2 years into my Curl adventure, (Happy curlyversary to me! Curly Since November 2009!) I have really become INTO the whole Curly Girl movement. No more of this "nappy" "kinky" derogatory statements and negative feeling about African American women's hair. Not in my mind. My curls are not a NAP. They are curls. And they would still be curls if they were zig zagged, waves, 2a or 4d. Doesn't matter. God did not create a "Nap". People who meant to mentally enslave Africans created that term, to make our ancestors feel subhuman, freakishly different and ashamed of our beauty. God made hair. All different colors, curl patterns and densities! Amen!
I am a curly mama, and this is my story. My FAITH is my confidence; and my natural beauty, INSIDE and OUT.....that's my swag!
