Man:
"...So and she really wanted to start REALLY talking..she liked me, i liked her..but i did some self evaluation not too long ago..and i was jus like, i dont think i could make her happy in the long run..i mean she was very independent, rent, payin for insurance, bills, the whole nine yards..and i didnt wanna be selfish and keep talking to her just cuz i liked her when i know it ossibly could go sour down the road..lol..but i tried to do the "grown up" thing.."
Me:
why did you think you wouldnt make her happy?
Man:
because were at two differnt places in life..she was 25..own place, own everything..i dont have none of the above..maybe a cell phone and car, but i still live at home and i still reap the benefits of doing so which means still gettin parents support for some things..im just being realistic..and i could tell that the next person that she had in her life, was the person permanently..meaning possible husband kids etc..im not sayin i cnt be permanent, granted not ready for those things yet, but i think eventually she wouldnt be happy because our responsibilities and priorities are so different now..and when my time comes to finally have those duties, she will have a hard time..so in all, she wouldnt be happy..especially at her age
Me:
Sooooo why couldnt you understand that age is more than a number again?
Do you see now, that life stages usually correspond somewhat with age?
Even if I didnt have kids, lived with my parents, and didnt have a life - I STILL wouldnt date a younger guy. Life stages are just different. I'd want so much more and so many different things because of my stage in life. Regardless of my actual standpoint - my mind is different.
and being Difficult does nothing but waste time. :) I'm glad you learned something tho. Happy you got to put your "mature guy" hat on.
Man:
ok ok ok..lol
REVELATION HERE:
ME:
(Which really could be also described as "lazy and just dont really feel like working hard at a relationship yet" ) hahaha but thats' most guys.
Man:
noooooo..i honestly and genuinely felt that way..cuz i was looking long term and not gettin caught up in the moment
Me:
Emotionally LAZY. hahaa Seeing all that you'd have to put into it, seeing all the frustration you'd have to love her more to be able to just overlook... Realizing that relationships are more than just an exclusive sex agreement and that there is mental and emotional work involved. Being dedicated enough to be whatever she needs and be open enough to take in and handle correctly all that she has to give...
Or maybe I shouldnt call it lazy. Maybe just :lacking incentive.
Women naturally take that head on and mentally work out whether we're up for that - before we even get into the relationship!
That's probably our problem. We are prepared for the bullshit already, so we can take it for a little while. Instead of running scared at the first sign of hard work like men do.
HELLO?!! SMH.
That is all, thankyou.
1 comment:
Interesting.. but not all guys think like that. And i really don't think it is about running. It is about pride and being able to provide. A man wants to be needed whether he says it or not. When he said "i did some self evalution". That means one of three things. A. He is not confident or something happen that made mim think about if he can make her happy. B. He no longer likes her or likes some else more. He doesn't want to hurt your feeling because you are emotional. C. (Probably the reason) He truely feels that you can provide more then he can, so that causes issues for him in a regards to male and females roles in relationships and marriage. Without solid communication it will end the relationship in the long run...
Just a thought - RS
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