So On the way to work today...

I was thinking about who it is I want to be. My therapist ( EeeeK! I sound like a crazy!) asked me what I want people to get from meeting me, or what I want their assesment of me to include. Did I want to come across as this rich widow who doesnt have to work? Did I want to be a hardworking single mom, whom know one really knows anything about? And I just looked at her. I dont know. I want to be someone new though. I do know that. I dont want to be the old me because there are so many stone walls and empty canyons left there. When I think of the "old Maya" I think of a person who was happy, but is now broken, and unproductive, and stagnant... and indecisive. I'm slowly becoming a new person - not leaving behind the good parts of who I was, because I did have many great things about me - fusing old and new together.

This newness I've taken on, and the changes I've purposely made are all shapes and sizes. The new small things; like my hair and residence, car and clothes, and becoming more organized are just my way of keeping up the momentum. The big things are parts of the old me that I started before, but want to start anew; like buying another home, starting another business, and finishing the writing of this novel, and putting forth the effort to meeting the goals I've set. I want to fuse the new little things with the new and improved old things and shape the new me. What I want it to look like when I"m done though... I have some idea.

I see it all the time. Whenever I think about my ultimate goals, of being a famous well to do writer, I see the same picture in my head. One of two actually. The first is me, speaking in front of a large crowd. But I"m much older then. That's all I can see. The second is me, walking around or sitting sometimes, in a large room with floor to ceiling windows. I'm at a very beautiful antique writing desk. The floors are wood, and the room is long like a sun-room/office. Its mine, and so is the house its in. And I can feel by the echoing in the room that the house is humongous. I'm a writer there too - but I'm many other things. I cant wait to be that person. I want to be refined and classy - quirky and eccentric. But overall I want to be generous! I want to have charities and foundations! It comes to me so fast like its not even my dream, like its something I saw somewhere - or something someone told me I was going to be!

I digress, back to the point! I can see and hear and feel what I'm working to be. I read somewhere that sitting in the this moment, at my "desk" or at my "podium" in my head is fuel for the manifestation. Its power for the soul, and fertilizer for the goals I've planted around me. I think its an excerise everyone should do. If only just to see! Where are you in 10 years? What is it like? What perfume/cologne are you wearing. The more specific the details the brighter the dream! Feel it. Be it. Go for it!




And one more thing,



I truly believe that the perfect breakfast choice at mcdonalds ( if there is such a thing... since it IS mcdonalds) is a chicken Egg and cheese biscuit. Thank you. *Steps down from oil of olay box*

But now I need some lunch.

xo